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Shaun the Sheep

4/24/2017

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Shaun the Sheep is a cute character from Aardman Animations. On the Shaun the Sheep YouTube channel, you can find short videos that your students will love. I use them in my small groups to reflect on positive school behaviors and interpersonal skills. When students earn a "lunch in the school counselor's office" reward, sometimes I show these clips while we eat. Each clip sparks great group discussion about what it means to "play fair," show good sportsmanship, treat others with respect, and more.

You could also use Shaun the Sheep during your classroom lessons to introduce a new concept, transition to a group activity, or close a lesson.
Here are some of my favorites...
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ClassDojo

4/23/2017

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When I want to keep track of specific behaviors during my group sessions, I use ClassDojo (previous Website of the Month). You can use it K-6, but it may need to look differently at each grade level. Not only does ClassDojo keep excellent data for me, it also helps my students set goals and identify the target behaviors they are demonstrating in each session.
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With ClassDojo, I can organize all of my groups and archive them at the end of each school year. I love being able to look back at how individual students and groups performed, because I can use that information to better facilitate future small groups.

Another great ClassDojo feature is that each group can focus on customizable target behaviors. Since the focus is on the positive behaviors, I don't include many negatives (where students lose "Dojo points"). The only negative I use is "disrespectful to others" because I want to show that I will not tolerate hurtful words or actions in our group sessions. I've never had to use it, but the students know it's there. I think it's important to show that in order for our group to be successful, we MUST be kind to one another; our group needs to be a safe space to communicate our thoughts and feelings.

I am lucky enough to have a SMARTboard in my room, so I project the ClassDojo screen and add points through that board. It helps students to see their progress throughout the session. Then, I reset the points at the end of the group (which doesn't delete the data) so that we can start fresh the next group time. If you don't have a SMARTboard, you can use your desktop computer, a tablet, or smart phone.
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ClassDojo also added some AMAZING video tools too! In their Big Ideas section, you can watch mini-series about growth mindset, perseverance, empathy, and gratitude. You can check out the first episodes on ClassDojo's YouTube channel, but if you create a free account on their main page, you can watch all of them.
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Ideas

4/14/2017

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What Do You Do With An Idea? is a wonderful book that explains how ideas can be exciting and scary, all at the same time. In the story, the main character likes their idea, but is worried about what other people might think or say.

Often, we spend so much time stressing about putting our thoughts and feelings on the table that we keep potentially AMAZING ideas to ourselves. Our students are no different. My goal is to encourage my creative, enthusiastic elementary kiddos to be confident and assertive; I want them to know that their opinions matter and that without them, the world would be a boring place, full of the same old ideas and the same old conversations.
You could open this lesson by showing the "Ideas Are Scary" commercial from GE. It grabs your attention and gives a clear symbol of how ideas enter the world, grow, and flourish.

Then, after reading the book, have a discussion with your students about why ideas are scary. Have they ever felt like they needed to keep their thoughts or feelings to themselves out of fear that someone might judge them? I wanted to focus this conversation on ideas that could make our school a better place - ideas that may seem impossible or silly at first.
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The students write down their ideas and add a picture to illustrate the impact of that idea (i.e. starting a buddy bench at school, sitting next to someone new at lunch, picking up litter in the hallway, etc.).
My Idea (PDF)
File Size: 97 kb
File Type: pdf
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Mind Yeti

3/14/2017

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I heard about Mind Yeti a little over a year ago when one of my colleagues tried it out. Her K-2 students loved it, so I thought I'd learn more. Once I began exploring the features, I was hooked!

For school counselors, this resource can be used individually, in small groups, during classroom lessons, and for the moments you need to close your door and "reboot" after a rough school moment. That's the beauty of Mind Yeti!
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Mind Yeti provides both a free resource and paid premium service. Through Mind Yeti, you get guided mindfulness sessions to help kids calm down, focus their attention, and transition to new activities. As I'm sure you've heard, mindfulness in the classroom can help create a happy, calm and positive culture. When you have a tool like Mind Yeti, it's easy to integrate mindfulness strategies into your day.

Session categories include: Calm Down, Focus, Get Along, Reset, Create, and Go to Sleep.
I've used Mind Yeti in a variety of settings, but my favorite has been during a 6th Grade classroom lesson. I have a "Relaxation Experiment" for the students and I incorporated Mind Yeti sessions. The students love the calming voices, soothing music, and overall content of the sessions.

Share How You Would Use Mind Yeti!

I'd love to hear about it in the
comment section below!
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Film Review: Children of Military Families

9/6/2014

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You may remember a film review I wrote a little over a year ago about Professor Child's wonderful films, Children and Grief and Children and Divorce. I recently watched another film called Children of Military Families.

This production is just as great as the other two! The film stars real children discussing the real struggle of having a parent in the military serving overseas. There are a variety of age groups and ethnicities, and feature both male and female children. The advice and stories feel truly authentic, not scripted or forced the way many resources can be.
I have numerous students who struggle with the stress, fear, and confusion that can come with a parent who has been deployed (or will be deployed). It can be difficult to find quality materials for these individuals and their families; I am so excited to share this new film with my school community!

I highly recommend that you check out these films at Professor Child's website and consider purchasing your own copies. Trust me. They are worth it! Although the topics are intense, the films are hopeful and remind you that you are not alone.

You can purchase a digital version of the film (available for immediate digital download) or a DVD. Additionally, Professor Child offers a FREE workbook that includes over 50 pages of thought-provoking discussion questions and creative exercises. The workbook is divided into 12 chapters that correspond directly with the film, which makes things even easier for busy school counselors. Plus, did I mention it's FREE?! ;)

Are you a director, writer, or production company? Do you have an educational film that you would like me to review on my blog? If so, contact me at marissa@elementaryschoolcounseling.org. I'd be happy to check out your work and spread the word to my readers.
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The Confidence Code

6/20/2014

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I try my hardest to avoid gender stereotyping. I often hear adults explain a student's behavior based on what society expects from boys and girls. You've heard it before...

                        "He's just a boy. He's going to hit someone if they start something."
                        "She's just a girl. She's a little emotional sometimes."

There are countless variations, but the message is the same: Boys are strong, confident, and aggressive; girls are gentle, sweet, and emotional. When little boys fall, we tell them they are fine and to dust themselves off. When little girls scrape their knees, we hug them and wipe their tears away. We, as a society, send a clear message about what we expect from each gender and we do this often without realizing it.

Is this a big deal, you may be asking? I know branching out and expanding our minds when it comes to gender stereotyping can be threatening to those who fear change. It can be threatening when an individual may benefit from the stereotype and/or when he or she genuinely enjoys their role. What I worry about is the shame boys and girls feel when they don't fit in. I worry about the box they feel stuck in and the environment that's stifling their development.
I stumbled upon a video discussing the "wussification" of men. In this video, the author expresses genuine horror at the thought of men or women deviating from their traditional gender roles.

One of the news anchors asks: "How do we teach our children to be who they are? How do we teach our boys to be boys and our girls to be girls without fitting them into these stereotypes?"

The question is its own answer, don't you think?
I may have already lost you. You may be angry at my opinion and you have every right to be, just as I have every right to be angry at the idea that feminism (seeing women as EQUAL, not better) is destroying our world and our men.

Pantene's #ShineStrong compaign (right) demonstrates this perfectly. Women often feel compelled to apologize for their thoughts and opinions. They can't be too forward or aggressive, lest they be considered the "b-word." I know I am guilty of saying "I'm sorry" to lessen the power and authority of my words.
So, where am I going with this? Well, school counselors have an opportunity to expose students to different ideas and encourage their interests and special skills. We can help a young girl who loves math gain the confidence she needs to stick with her advanced coursework and join math-related clubs, even if there are few females doing the same. We can support a boy who loves to dance more than he loves shooting hoops. We can love the students who DO fit their gender stereotypes and find ways to help them love, respect, and understand those who don't. And vice versa.
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I know this post already has a lot of videos, but I had to share this interview from The Colbert Report as well. Katty Kay and Claire Shipman wrote a book about self-assurance, specifically what causes women to lack the confidence they need to be as successful as they can be. I took their confidence quiz and found out that I have "high confidence." Funnily enough, I was nervous that I'd be labeled otherwise. What's great about the quiz is that the authors provide suggestions for how I can keep my level of confidence and how to help others boost their confidence as well.

Use the #ConfidenceCode hashtag to share your own experiences and even nominate a confident woman in your life. Just visit www.theconfidencecode.com for more information.
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Want to take the Confidence Quiz?

Click here!


For more self-concept lessons, visit my small group and classroom counseling pages.

The Colbert Report
Get More: Daily Show Full Episodes,Indecision Political Humor,The Colbert Report on Facebook

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That's What She Said

4/1/2014

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As you may know, I am currently expecting a baby in May. When I used to imagine pregnancy as this hypothetical, may-never-happen scenario, I thought that it would be a magical, "I'm at peace" type of experience. I thought about what my growing stomach would represent - life, a new beginning, love. I thought about "the glow" that you would radiate, like your own personal sunshine.

Well, that's not exactly what I've experienced.
I struggled with getting pregnant so I thought I'd take everything in stride. I promised myself that no matter what, I wouldn't complain, because I was lucky to have this experience. Of course, I still understand that...I know that...it's just hard to remember sometimes.

The worst part for me is the constant (and I mean CONSTANT) feedback I get from family, friends, and complete strangers. When I say feedback, I mean feedback on my appearance. I've been publicly assessed through every stage of my pregnancy and the public has determined that overall, I'm not up to snuff.
You know the comments: Are you sure you aren't having twins? Whoa, you've really gotten big! That baby is going to be huge! You look even bigger today than you did yesterday. Are you sure you're going to make it?

I know they mean well, so I smile and give one of my prepared "I know" responses. But inside? I feel defeated. I feel judged. I feel completely uncomfortable in my own skin. I feel that every minute of every day is an opportunity for someone to label my body. There are mornings when I get dressed and I look in the mirror feeling really good about myself...then I go out in public, receive the verdict on my personal appearance, and instantly get put back in my place. A place that I haven't been in a long time. I DO have to note that I have MANY loving, encouraging, and accepting individuals in my life who help pull me back up and dust off my insecurities. And, like I said earlier, I don't think the negative comments are meant to be negative. It's like a well-meaning gift wrapped in sandpaper. It stings to open it, but it's not malicious.

For the majority of my life, I've been content with my body. It was able to move easily, fit into the clothes I wanted to wear, and had a sort of "invisibility cloak" that exempted me (for the most part) from public scrutiny. Now, I have to adjust to a completely different set of life experiences and expectations for what my day is going to look like. I find myself wanting to stay inside, avoiding the awkward encounters.

Recently, I REALLY got to thinking. What would I tell a student who felt judged for his or her appearance? I'd advise them to tell people how they felt. Have I done that? No, I haven't. My instinct was to protect the jury from embarrassment or guilt by being "nice." I also felt that their judgment of my body had to be right, so it became my inner monologue. I started to worry so much about hearing those words that when they happened, it confirmed the ever-booming voice in my head: "See, there IS something wrong with you."

As a society, we appear to be moving forward. We have shed light on the digital enhancement of professional photographs. We have included plus-sized models in fashion events. We have a "new and improved" doll (right) modeled after an average-sized American 19-year-old. But...we still adjust our photos, we label women "plus-sized," and we celebrate a victory for women based on how a doll LOOKS.

Megan McCormick wrote an interesting piece about the Lammily doll, saying she didn't care what it looks like. McCormick reminds her readers that the public isn't outraged over the ripped physique of superhero figures. Why? Well, as she puts it, "when you think of Superman, you don’t think about his six pack or his rippling muscles. You think about what he can do—the lives he saves, the incredible feats he achieves, even his personality. His appearance isn’t your first priority." In other words, it shouldn't matter what Barbie looks like - we should be focusing on what she can DO.
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If you haven't checked out the "That's What She Said" series from Soulpancake, here's one of the episodes. Women discuss their experiences with beauty and body image; it's amazing how universal these feelings of inadequacy are. For the most part, we have all been judged for our outward appearance, reaping the benefits of what society feels is beautiful or suffering the consequences of not measuring up to the high standards.

The poem at the end is hopeful and empowering. It allowed me to take a step back and enjoy my body for what it's providing - life.


Want to teach your students about self-esteem?

Check out these sections of my website:
Classroom-Based Counseling
Small Group Counseling
Individual Counseling
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Don't Worry. Be Happy.

3/5/2014

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At my District Leadership Team meeting this evening, we opened with this very entertaining and also VERY enlightening video from TEDx Talks. The presenter, Shawn Achor, discusses how happiness can positively impact our lives, including how successful we feel at work, home, and beyond.

I think this would be a great video to show at a staff meeting or to cut into segments to discuss with older students. I would like to use these concepts to help my 6th graders, in particular, find better ways to deal with stress, disappointment, frustration, and failure. There are some aspects of the talk that may be inappropriate for your intended population, so be sure to view and decide which sections, if any, you'd like to share with those specific individuals.

Just watch. You will be glad you did.

How would you use this video to help your
students and/or staff?

Let me know your ideas in the comments section! :)
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Gifted Education and School Counseling

2/7/2014

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I've been meaning to write this post for a while now, but haven't been able to find the words to adequately express my thoughts on the subject. Gifted Education is one of those topics that causes my head and heart to merge, creating a swirl of ideas, memories, thoughts, and feelings. Flashes of my old classrooms and peers pour into my mind, pushing all rationality to the bottom, almost as if I'm drowning in the past.

Okay, this is a little dramatic, but hey, I'm a little dramatic.

The rest of this post is just a snapshot of my thoughts on the subject of Gifted Education and may not be particularly useful, but I still wanted to put it out there.

When I was in 3rd grade, I remember being isolated from the rest of my class so I could work on different assignments. In 4th grade, I began our district's Gifted Education program (G.A.T.E.). I was taken out of my classroom 2 days a week to practice critical thinking skills and spend time with other kids who qualified. I don't remember having any of this explained to me. It just became a part of my school life.

I loved my G.A.T.E. classes and wanted to share what I was learning with my friends...it turns out that they did not want to know. In fact, my closest friends made fun of me, hid from me at recess, and I remember crying almost every day at school. I started to feel like standing out was a bad thing because it made other people uncomfortable - it made you lose friends, a currency worth more than gold in the school world. I began to slack off by rushing through my homework, quitting my favorite clubs or groups if my friends didn't make the cut, and pretending like I knew less than I did. By 8th grade, I decided to quit G.A.T.E. and take other lower level classes instead. Since my junior high grades were good (straight A's), no one said anything to me. No one asked why I was doing what I was doing. All I wanted was to fight my urge to push myself and stand out, but felt forced into a little box.   

It took me years to overcome the little voice in my head saying, "Don't make other people uncomfortable." I wish I was able to have the confidence to be my authentic self back in elementary school when the pressure to conform was strongest. I wish someone would have noticed that my tears and my subtle withdrawal was more than just me being a sensitive kid. It was me feeling like I could never fit in no matter what group I was in. I felt like I wasn't smart enough for the G.A.T.E. kids and wasn't cool enough for the rest of my class. I was a misfit, just finding ways to cover up who I really was with different clothes, different hobbies, and a different personality.
This past November, I attended a conference about Gifted Ed that brought all of these memories to the surface. As our keynote speaker, Dr. Jim Delisle, explained research on students who are gifted and support strategies to use, I felt myself tearing up. I thought back to recess, when a student kicked a ball at me, causing me to fall into a puddle of mud. I thought back to 7th grade G.A.T.E. when I felt like I didn't even fit in socially with my fellow gifted students and began to withdraw further. I thought back to college classes, counting how many times I raised my hand so I wouldn't be annoying to the rest of the class.
School struggles of any kind don't just go away. In fact, as I re-read this post I can't help but want to delete what I've written out of fear of being misunderstood. Feelings of self-doubt and self-loathing are villains that are difficult to overcome without some help, but that's why there are school counselors, right?!

As school counselors, we can help our gifted students (a population typically pushed to the side because they are "easier") find the confidence they need to achieve great things. We can teach them social skills, organization, goal-setting, and stress management. We can be their safe place to vent. We can remind them that even if they feel alone now, it gets better. The world is a big place with big possibilities. They will find lasting friendships with those who will appreciate and challenge them. We can remind them to never give up.

I hope my story feels more educational than self-indulgent. Of course, it DOES feel good to express the feelings I bottled up for so long, so maybe it was a little self-indulgent. I just want school counselors to remember this population of students because it's easy to leave them behind.

Thanks for listening. :)

Helpful Resources

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Great Websites

Davidson Institute for Talent Development www.davidsongifted.org
Jim Delisle www.creativelearningconsultants.com/jimdelisle.html
Top Blogs http://giftedchallenges.blogspot.com/2013/08/top-blogs-about-gifted-children-gifted.html
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I Remember

1/14/2014

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When I was younger, I begged my parents for a pet. "My life is not complete without a dog," I'd say...over and OVER again. I went to my local library and researched dogs - how to train them, how to determine if a potential dog is right for you, etc. My parents still did not seem convinced.

Exactly 1 week after my 14th birthday, we received a phone call from my aunt who told us that her dog, to her surprise, just had puppies. Needless to say, my aunt's frustration combined with my research-based whining weakened my parents' defenses long enough for them to say, "Okay, fine."

Before I knew it, we were bringing our darling Cookie home.
Cookie was there during major moments in my life. She was by my side, "hugging me" when I was going through a rough break-up, when my grandparents died, when I went away to college and felt like I was losing all of my friends, when my dad was fighting cancer, when I was sick and needed comfort, when my husband (then boyfriend) was studying abroad for a year...she was the one who never judged. She was the one who stood by everyone in my family and loved us for exactly who we were.

Sadly, I had to say goodbye to my little girl yesterday morning. My dad called, telling me she was in pain and that they needed to take her to the vet. I left school to be there and watched Cookie slip into a peaceful sleep. I went back to work, completely unprepared for how this would affect me. I thought about her face and the last goofy smile she gave me before she was gone. It was difficult to focus on anything else. My overly-dramatic "my life is not complete without a dog" mantra was true; I certainly felt emptier without her.
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I often work with students who have lost a family pet and are struggling with their grief. It's hard to explain death to students without crossing the line religiously (if you're in a public school) or without scaring them more. How do we comfort a 5-year-old who misses her cat? How do we answer a 10-year-old's honest questions about where his hamster went after she died? 

I have a number of grief resources here, but I thought it would be helpful to add a few that were specific to pet loss.
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I Remember is about a little boy whose dog became sick and died. The boy dealt with grief. He could not stop crying and no longer enjoyed the activities that used to make him happy. Over time, the pain subsided and the boy was able to think about the happy memories with his dog and enjoy life again.
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Houdini Was is a true story (written and illustrated by a 2nd Grade class) about a class pet named Houdini. The book was a way for the students to express their grief, but in a positive, productive way. In the book, the students say that they are choosing to be happy because Houdini was special to them and they want to remember all of the great things about her, not just the sadness they feel right now.
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Dog Heaven, also available in Cat Heaven, is a way to comfort pet owners of any age. Due to public school policies, this should be used with discretion. Dog Heaven may be a great resource to send home so an entire family can read it together. It could also be a jumping off point for a student to create his/her own book to imagine what a pet is doing in heaven.
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Another helpful grief activity is having a student create a memory book. You can purchase a set of softcover books or hardcover books that students can draw their memories in. Also, I will sometimes call parents and ask permission for extra photographs that the student can add, making the final product even more personal and comforting.

I typically work on these books in individual school counseling sessions over the course of a few months. Each session, we work on a couple pages of memories. This can also be done effectively in a small group.
Finally, if you have access to pictures (and even video), you can help your student create a slideshow of the person or animal who died. Then, the student can think of the song that represents that person or animal’s life the best and add that to the video. The final product is a beautiful tribute to their loved one.

I created the video on the right to remember Cookie. I can honestly say that it helped me cope with my grief. Maybe it would help your students too. :)
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    My name is Marissa Rex and I am a 1st Grade teacher and an elementary school counselor from Ohio. I hope you enjoy my site!

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